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Post by skyeknight on Apr 26, 2017 13:02:37 GMT
"B-But I could!" she said, "P-Practice on myself I mean..."
There were so many memories she wished she could have forgotten. The things that kept her from going out and living her life. Omar might not have been happy with this alternative of hers, but she would rather not remember how she had been hurt in the past. If she forgot the hurt that was holding her back, she might even be braver. He wanted her to learn to come to terms with what happened to her, but he had centuries to allow time to ease the pain. She had one life and it was a half life at that because she was too afraid to go out and do anything. That and she could gain control of her powers. But she needed safety nets, something to prevent her from doing something wrong. She would start small, erase little things and work her way up.
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Post by angelofmusic1992 on Apr 26, 2017 15:04:39 GMT
Adeline bit her lip. She wished she wouldn't have said that. Sometimes practice was the only way you could get comfortable with something, but was having Namine use her powers on herself really the best thing? "Are you sure you want to do that?" she asked. "You just said you were reluctant to use them on other people for fear of hurting them. Aren't you afraid of hurting yourself?" If Namine didn't really care about what happened to her, as long as other people didn't get hurt, that could pose a problem. Not to mention, it could reveal some deep-rooted problems that Namine had with herself.
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Post by skyeknight on Apr 26, 2017 15:26:40 GMT
"B-But I want to forget." Namine said.
She wanted to forget Vanitas hurting her. She didn't to linger on how her father hurt her. She didn't want to jump at shadows anymore. She wanted to be able to do something for once in her life instead of constantly cowering about unforeseen consequences. But Adeline was right. If she ended up hurting herself, she knew a number of people who would be mad at her for putting herself in that situation in the first place. Aqua. Omar. Jane. Probably Adeline. She pursed her lips. She wasn't sure how she was supposed to get better at a form of magic she couldn't use.
"S-Should I try on a-animals? B-Birds or things?" she asked.
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Post by angelofmusic1992 on Apr 26, 2017 16:28:50 GMT
"Maybe. It might be kind of hard to know if an animal has forgotten something though, unless we had someone that could communicate with them," Adeline said. There was probably someone like that in the city, but Adeline wouldn't know how to go about finding them. Plus, no doubt some people would question the ethical problems with testing magic on animals. This was a real pickle Namine was in, and Adeline wasn't sure if either of them had any resources that might help, save for the books. "Well, at least these have given us something to think about," she said, pushing the book towards Namine. "I know a lot of spells, but none that have to do with memories. I never really had a need for them."
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Post by skyeknight on Apr 26, 2017 19:07:13 GMT
"T-Then what do I do?" she asked.
She was at a loss. She couldn't practice on other people. She couldn't practice on herself. She couldn't hurt animals. She was literally a time bomb waiting to happen. She bit her lip and avoided looking up at Adeline. Her fingers laced tightly together, going white knuckled and tense. She was scared of herself. But she was tired of being so afraid all the time, but it seemed that now she was trying to move past it, something got in the way.
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Post by angelofmusic1992 on Apr 26, 2017 22:01:00 GMT
Namine seemed even more anxious than before. Adeline wasn't sure if she was helping much. It seemed like there were a lot of obstacles to this problem, and there was no expert they could turn to. 'Well, we can start by working with what we have," she said as she gestured towards the books. "You can probably start with these, figure out exactly what the pros and cons of this power is, and which parts you'd like to get good at. Once you do that, we can get a game plan going on how exactly you can learn the skills you want." It was a tentative plan, but Adeline felt like it was better than nothing. Namine at least had some resources now. That was better than nothing.
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Post by skyeknight on Apr 27, 2017 13:47:09 GMT
Namine reached out to pick up one of the books. They had already discussed pros and cons of the power. There were more negative points to the ability than there were positive highlights. Even the slightest of errors could end up hurting someone or herself. It left her feeling even more frustrated and helpless than she already did. Knowledge was power. Reading was understanding. The more she knew, the more she might be able to control this curse of hers.
"Y-You think I can?" she asked.
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Post by angelofmusic1992 on Apr 27, 2017 15:41:37 GMT
Adeline nodded. "Yeah. I mean, if you can make progress in dealing with Vanitas, you can handle this." Sure, Namine still seemed timid, but she had come here on her own. That had to mean she was making some progress in getting over what Vanitas had done, right? And if she ever did get scared in handling this, she had lots of friends who were willing to help her out. Even if none of the people around her had memory-altering powers like she did, they could still offer support. Sometimes, that was the most important thing somebody could do.
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Post by skyeknight on Apr 27, 2017 21:01:31 GMT
"B-But I haven't d-dealt with it." Namine said.
She had been running away from what happened to her since she got back. She looked down at the book, seemingly trying to make herself smaller to avoid Adeline's scrutiny. Adeilne had done so much for her already and Namine was still just a disappointment after all of it. She swallowed thickly. This wasn't easy. But she wasn't coping well either. The whole situation fed into itself in a vicious cycle that hadn't broken despite her attempts.
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Post by angelofmusic1992 on Apr 27, 2017 21:47:15 GMT
"Come on, you've taken some steps in the right direction haven't you?" Adeline said. "You could have spent today hiding in your apartment, but you came here, all on your own. You could have just ignored your problem with your powers, but you tried to find some information on them." Those might be small steps, but they were still important. Adeline knew first hand that small improvements were better than no improvement at all. "If you still feel scared when doing this stuff, that's okay. The point is that you're still doing it anyway, and that's pretty brave."
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Post by skyeknight on Apr 28, 2017 1:41:26 GMT
"It doesn't f-feel like much," she argued.
It was more or less her close friends were forcing her to try to get some normalcy back to her life. But it was good to let things fall into a familiar pattern. She wanted to be useful for once. She wanted to stop being so afraid. However, moving past this and letting things go was harder than she had anticipated. No wonder it took Omar centuries to do it. But she was human. She wouldn't have that luxury.
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Post by angelofmusic1992 on Apr 28, 2017 3:02:00 GMT
"Well, a little progress is better than none at all," Adeline said. "Look, you're not going to be 100% better in a day. So any progress you make should be celebrated." She paused for a moment before continuing. "Honestly, I've had times too when I was afraid to leave the house. When I first summoned Thrax...and when I ran into Vanitas myself...I just wanted to hide and never come out. I guess it's just...something I do whenever something bad happens. And I don't get over it just like that. It takes a while. The important thing was that I gradually got things back to normal. Well, as normal as things can be around here." Bellerouge was kind of the opposite of "normal" and Adeline was an especially odd case. There weren't that many witches that ran around with a demon side inside them. Or, if there were, they didn't last long. Cases like hers usually ended up with the witch being dead, by one way or another. Adeline was lucky to have survived this long, to be honest.
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Post by skyeknight on Apr 28, 2017 15:28:19 GMT
"B-But... you seem so confident."
And Adeline did. It was hard to imagine her as scared. But she did have a run in with not one but two demons. That would be scary for anyone involved. Maybe Adeline had just mastered that art of 'faking it until you make it'. Namine's idea of normal was complacency. She didn't do much and she didn't exactly go out to do anything exciting. She was barely living life as it was. She supposed that was a silver lining of the situation. She realized there were so many things she hadn't done that she wanted to, but had been too afraid to do them.
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Post by angelofmusic1992 on Apr 28, 2017 16:38:15 GMT
Adeline gave a little laugh. "Not all the time. Pitch can tell you that," she said. Really, she put on a brave face for Namine because she didn't want her friend feeling any worse. She was already anxious about a lot of things, Adeline didn't want her to start worrying about her too. Besides, if she could use what she had learned to help somebody, then she was all for it. Although, she did have to admit, she acted differently when it came to her friends and Pitch. With her friends, she could get chatty, especially if it was a topic she really liked. With Pitch, she was quieter, but it wasn't an uncomfortable silence. The two of them were just like that when they were together, and they liked it. They never had to say much. Being in each other's company was enough.
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Post by skyeknight on Apr 29, 2017 16:05:22 GMT
"Pitch from the B-BPD?" Namine asked.
She didn't really talk much to the man. Mostly because he was really intimidating. He also seemed like he never had time for doing anything aside from his police work, but finding that he actually had a social life shouldn't have been as surprising as it was. But if he was friends with someone as nice as Adeline, maybe he wasn't as scary as he seemed. And as much as she hated to admit it, it was nice to know someone else was going through the same things she was. She gave a slow smile.
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